


confusing gay

by luftkommandant



Category: The Secret Saturdays
Genre: M/M, cold gay, good gay, snow gay
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-11-13
Updated: 2015-11-13
Packaged: 2018-05-01 10:50:57
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,478
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5203079
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/luftkommandant/pseuds/luftkommandant
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>when you're horrible at making titles</p>
            </blockquote>





	confusing gay

Doyle glared up at the still-snowing sky and pulled his coat even tighter around him. It was so cold he was honestly tempted to suggest huddling for warmth. But he doubted Leonidas “I’m too straight for this” Van Rook would go for that, the big baby.

They were in Maine, in a shitty rental car with no heat during a stakeout. They were waiting for a known sponsor of Weird World to come out of the fancy restaurant they had trailed him to, and it had been two hours with no sign of him. It was pitch dark except for the light from the restaurant, and still Doyle could see his breath.

“Can’t we just go back to the motel? He’s not coming out,” Leonidas complained, scowling and wishing he had insisted on driving. He knew just how stubborn Doyle could be, and had chosen to ignore it. So technically this was his fault.

Doyle shivered and turned to the older man. “No, I need to do this for Zak. And I’m not paying you to complain,” he shot back, getting a bit irritable from the cold. He knew he should give up but Zak was depending on him. And none of their other leads had worked out. He needed something.

Leonidas sighed and leaned his seat back. “Wake me up when something happens,” he grumbled, closing his eyes. Doyle shot him a dirty look, then focused his attention back on the restaurant door.

An hour later, there was still nothing and the restaurant had been closed for half an hour. Maybe he had gone out a side door or something. Doyle groaned and turned the car on, making Leonidas grumble in his sleep. “Hey, asshole, wake up,” he snapped, stirring his former mentor out of a light sleep.

“What? Is something happening? Why are we moving?” Leonidas asked, sitting up and putting his seat back up. He looked around to find that they were nearing the motel, and half smiled at the thought of a warm bed. Without answering him Doyle drove on, frowning.

The second the car was off, Doyle jumped out and half jogged to the door to their room and unlocked it. Leonidas followed on his heels, and made sure to lock all of the locks on the door while Doyle stormed into the bathroom. As he was pulling off his boots he heard the shower start, and then a minute later something that sounded almost like crying.

He stood up to go listen at the door to the bathroom, and sighed when he confirmed that Doyle was crying. And not exactly trying to hide it, too. For a moment Leonidas debated with himself, then knocked on the door. “Are you okay?” he called.

There was a pause in the sobbing, then Doyle yelled back, “No.” He sounded like a wreck.

“Can I, uh, come in?”

“Yeah, uh, sure, I guess.”

Leonidas took a breath, then opened the door. He was immediately thankful that there was an actual shower curtain instead of the shitty glass doors. That would be a little bit awkward. If this situation could get even more awkward. Taking another deep breath, he sat down with his back against the sink and looked towards the door. “What’s wrong?” he asked, his voice more gentle than it had ever been when directed at Doyle.

“I’m gonna, uh, get out. Can you like look away or something?” Doyle said, peeking out from behind the curtain. Leonidas nodded and covered his eyes as the water turned off. He heard Doyle getting out and pulling his clothes on, and sitting next to him. “You can open your eyes now.”

Leonidas opened his eyes to find Doyle was closer to him than they’d ever been, and also only wearing black boxers. Their legs were touching, Doyle’s shoulder was pressed into his, and the smaller man’s face was inches away from his own. His eyes were red and puffy, and still leaking tears. Without thinking, Leonidas reached up and wiped a tear away with his thumb. When Doyle didn’t move away, he kept his hand there for a moment longer than he should’ve then returned it to his lap and looked away, trying to hide the blush that warmed his face.

They sat in silence for a few minutes before Doyle spoke. “Can we like, get into bed or something? I’m really cold.”

“You mean like... together?” Leonidas asked, and had to admit that he didn’t really mind that idea.

“Yeah, uh, if that’s cool with you,” Doyle replied, looking at his feet and blushing a little.

Leonidas half-smiled, heaving himself up. “If anything’s ‘cool’ right now, I’ll fight it,” he joked, offering a hand to help Doyle up. Doyle took it, and thankfully realized he should put a shirt on, but didn’t think to put anything else on. Leonidas tried not to, but he knew he found the redhead attractive. Especially with nothing but boxers and a tight shirt on. Honestly, he’d be fine if the shirt weren’t there. And the boxers.

There was only one bed, and the original plan was for Leonidas to sleep on the floor, but it seemed like that was getting thrown out. They both still stuck to their own side, until Leonidas reached out to turn the light out and suddenly Doyle was at his side, laying his head on his shoulder.Leonidas tensed up a bit, sucking in a breath. “Oh, uh, I’m sorry,” Doyle whispered as he pulled away.

“No, no, I was just surprised. I kind of, uh, liked that,” Leonidas hurriedly replied. Doyle smiled sadly and set his head back down, almost nuzzling into his former mentor. Leonidas put his arm on Doyle’s back, feeling the muscle through the fabric of the shirt. Doyle moved even closer, putting a leg gently over Leonidas’, and sneaking a hand around over his stomach. His other hand rested against his ribcage, cold against a warm body. “Why were you crying?”

Doyle didn’t reply for a minute, and Leonidas was starting to wonder if he was asleep when he answered. “I felt bad. I just feel like I’ve failed Zak, y’know? It’s been a month and we’ve got nothing. He’s been calling at least once a week, asking if I’ve got anything, and I just have to keep telling him no, and it’s making me feel like shit.” By now there were tears on his face again, and Leonidas shifted so they were face to face and Doyle was kind of tucked into his chest. Putting one of his hands behind Doyle’s back, he used the other to wipe the tears off of his face.

“I’m sorry, I just haven’t really been... doing that well, y’know? I’m just sad all the time. And everything sucks. I feel like I’m dying inside,” he explained between sobs.

“Here,” Leonidas said, shifting so they were both sitting up and pulling Doyle into his lap so they were face to face. He held the redhead as close to himself as he could, with his head over his shoulder and Doyle’s legs wrapped around his waist while he cried into his shirt. The cheap comforter was still wrapped around them, and Leonidas pulled it tighter as a shiver moved through Doyle’s body. “I know how that feels,” he started, whispering into his ear. “I feel like that too.”

“And I just can’t feel safe. I’m scared of everything. I’m scared of people, I’m scared of the sun, I’m scared of my own shadow,” Doyle sobbed into his neck, holding Leonidas as tight as he could. It seemed like there was hardly an inch of their skin that wasn’t touching.

Leonidas held Doyle until he had stopped crying, and then some. By the time they were lying down Doyle was almost asleep, and groggily wrapped his arms around Leonidas. He pressed his face into the bigger man’s neck, and Leonidas could feel his breath on his skin. He wrapped his arms around Doyle, who was half lying on him, and pressed a kiss to his forehead. “You’ll be okay, I’ll keep you safe, I promise,” he whispered into Doyle’s hair.

Doyle looked up at him with still watering eyes. “Can we do this every night? Minus the crying?” he half-joked, smiling weakly. Leonidas smiled back, and pulled his former apprentice completely onto him until their foreheads were resting together.

“Can I kiss you?” Leonidas asked, and was honestly surprised when Doyle nodded and pressed their lips together. When they separated Doyle smiled and nestled his head in the space between Leonidas’ neck and shoulder. Leonidas smiled and closed his eyes, knowing this was why he agreed to work for Doyle. So he could protect him and for the possibility that some day, if any of this ever worked out, maybe they could kiss a little more.


End file.
